Loved this week’s episode so much. It made me happy that you guys got to see a little more of Erik, pulling back the veil on his backstory and childhood. There was so much good stuff that you didn’t get to see–so much about his strength, his grit, his determination, his self-sufficiency, and the incredible way he pulled himself out of a bad situation that would have hobbled most people–but I feel like it was, at least, hinted at. He’s a good egg, you guys. The best.
It’s a girl!
Erik and I were both hoping and praying for a daughter, but we each had a dream that it was a boy (as did my father). Weirdly, I actually had a dream I was pregnant when I was pregnant, but four days before I discovered it.
I called my best friend and said, “I had a dream I was holding this little baby, and I loved him more than anything in the world, and I couldn’t stop staring at him and thinking how perfect and beautiful he was. I think it was your (newborn) son.”
She replied, “Um, maybe you were dreaming about your own baby. Are you sure you’re not pregnant?”
I realized the signs were there: missed period. Bloating. Mood swings. I paid extra attention the next few days, and once enough time had gone by that it felt significant, Erik and I took the test.
But it wasn’t a he. It was a she.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been terrified of pregnancy.
I’m a squeamish person: the type who faints when getting blood drawn and needs somebody to hold my hand during shots. The idea of having a person growing inside me, pushing my organs aside and stealing my blood and life force, completely freaked me out. I’d make jokes about parasites and aliens (and Alien) and mean it.
But then I got pregnant…and I was stunned to realize that I LOVED it.
So after yesterday’s post and big announcement, I know some of you are finally cottoning on to why life has been so different for me recently and why the blog posts went from daily to weekly late last year.
Let’s just say it’s been busy. And no, not the self-imposed, “OMG, you guys, I’m totally so busy! LOL!” that you normally hear people whine about. Busy in an “I’ve been taking as many non-essential things off my plate as possible, but there is still not enough time in the day, week, or month because I have a book due while everything else is going on, and that’s just my life now, and holy hell is it hard, but I am soldiering on and doing my best” kind of way.
Not a badge of honor signaling how important I am. Not a point of pride implying that I am superwoman. Just juggling, treading water, trying not to screw up the few things that must be done.
USWeekly.com broke the news: on tonight’s episode of Newlyweds, Erik and I found out we’re pregnant!